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Steps You Can Take to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

By Career Guidance, Executive Assistant, Leadership, Training

Emotional intelligence is one of the most beneficial skills you can have as a professional in C-level support. Emotional intelligence improves self-awareness, allows you to communicate with clarity, and helps to control your emotions in challenging situations. In addition, emotional intelligence can improve your ability to collaborate and regulate stress. Here are some steps that you can take right now to strengthen your emotional intelligence.

Active Listening

Many people listen without fully processing what the other person is saying. You can foster emotional intelligence by listening carefully when others speak and making sure you clearly understand them before responding. Listening also involves observing nonverbal communication, such as facial expressions and gestures. Active listening can improve empathy and reduce misunderstandings in the workplace.

Self-Awareness

Emotional awareness is a critical component of emotional intelligence. One way you can improve emotional intelligence is to regularly ask yourself how you feel in a given moment. As you become more self-aware, you gain a better understanding of your strengths, weaknesses, likes, and dislikes. Over time, you will learn what activities trigger happiness and which ones fill you with dread. You’ll also become aware of what stressors you should try to avoid. Likewise, you will gain insight into what types of people relax you and what personality types bring you down.

Attitudes and Habits

As you become more self-aware, you can start to cultivate a positive attitude as a habit. There are steps you can take to improve your mood, such as eating healthy foods, exercising regularly, and maintaining a regular sleep pattern, which in turn will help improve emotional intelligence. When you practice keeping a positive perspective, you will work better with others, maintain focus easier, and improve your overall motivation. Other activities such as meditation can also improve your daily mood.

Responding Instead of Reacting

Reacting to triggers is a habit that can cause a lot of tension and stress. It is important to monitor how you react to things like requests and constructive feedback. Instead of reacting impulsively, practice receiving information, taking a deep breath, and responding without emotion. For example, if someone gives you negative feedback, instead of becoming angry, receive their criticism with an open mind and thank the person for taking the time to help you improve.

In C-level support, improving emotional intelligence can make you a healthier, more productive professional. You can begin to foster emotional intelligence by practicing active listening, learning to self-reflect, making positivity a habit, and responding thoughtfully.

 

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Stronger Than Yesterday

By Executive Assistant, Hiring Strategies, Leadership

Resilience. It’s one of the secrets to survival, both professionally and personally. It’s what’s gotten you to where you are, and it’s what will help define who you will become. Looking back at some of the toughest situations you’ve endured, you may have felt there was no other choice. It was a natural instinct. And while it’s true that resilience can come innately, it’s also a learned skill. Instead of leaving resilience up to chance, consider strengthening those muscles by choice. How can we lead a more resilient life, and lead a more resilient team, in the year to come?

A Core of Confidence

Everyone has an inner critic. Who do you compare yourself to, and why? Although comparison can create competition, which in turn can fuel achievement, it’s a balancing act. While constructive criticism can deter certain behaviors in the short-term, positive reinforcement is generally better for shaping new and lasting behavior. It’s also at the core of creating confidence.

As a leader, recognize that criticism doesn’t increase competency. You are simply sharing what not to do, instead of what to do. Imagine a child learning how to ride a bicycle. Which environment shapes a more confident future cyclist: pointing out each time they fell down, or pointing out what they did to stay up?

Confidence increases productivity and causes you to choose more challenging tasks, which makes you stand out amongst your peers. You naturally create a more cohesive workplace environment; confident people celebrate the accomplishments of others as opposed to insecure individuals who try to steal the spotlight and criticize others in order to prove their worth. Speaking first and often (a sign of high self-esteem) makes others perceive you as a leader. In fact, over-confident people are more likely to be promoted than those who have actually accomplished more.

A Fondness for Failure

Consider failures as beginnings, rather than endings. You’ve probably learned more from failures than any other source of wisdom. Teach yourself, and your team, to focus on the data and facts. Embrace failure’s value as a teacher, get curious about the information it provides, and be open to where it leads you next. You may even find you fail less when you don’t fear it.

Failure is either redirecting or reaffirming. If failure caused you to take a different path, it’s because you saw it heading towards a dead-end. If failure caused you to get back up and keep going, it reaffirms you are committed to a goal and it’s worth fighting for.

The Power of Purpose

We have the freedom to choose our actions, our profession, our financial needs, and the path of our life. Each day is not about what we have to do. It’s about what we get to do. Strength can come from the recognition that there is a bigger purpose, a desire to make a difference, and a need to have a higher meaning behind the choices we make.

Spend time focusing on this for yourself personally, and with those you lead. Some points to ponder:

  • Who in my life do I care to impact the most? How specifically am I going to mentor and impact those individuals?
  • What are five things I would put on my bucket list, and with whom would I want to experience them?
  • What experiences am I most appreciative of in my life? How can I help others have that same experience?
  • What moment in your life are you most proud of? How can you duplicate more of those moments?
  • What, and who, am I thankful for today?

“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.”
– Ralph Waldo Emerson

The Steps for Success

Teach the importance of:

  • Taking a deep breath.
  • Taking another.
  • Focusing on the next thing that needs to be done in order to keep going.

If you wake up suffocated by the list of things that need to get accomplished today, start with getting up and brushing your teeth. When you feel anxiety over an important deadline, make a list of things that need to be done and do just one of them. If your email inbox is exhausting, unsubscribe to a few distribution lists that you never signed up for. Stop longingly looking at pictures of other people’s photos on social media, and spend that time scrolling through your own pictures and cherished memories instead. Don’t focus on the big things. Start with the littlest and decide where to go from there. Take an action, any action. Manufacture your own momentum.

Have an appreciation for your history. What are some of the toughest things you’ve experienced? How did you get through them? You probably already know quite a bit about being resilient but haven’t stopped to admire it.

Remember: you’ve got this. The person who has gotten you through the toughest parts of your life is you.

 

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How to Set and Achieve Your Goals in the New Year

By Executive Assistant, Hiring Strategies, Leadership

With all of the challenges of the past year, it seems that most of us are looking forward to turning over a new leaf in 2021. Now is the time to start thinking about what you want to accomplish in 2021. January is full of promise and opportunities as we all look to having a fresh start. Below are some tips to set and achieve your goals in the new year.

Think Carefully about Your New Year’s Resolutions

The first step is deciding what your goals for the year will be. The key is to be optimistic but not overly ambitious. If you choose a goal that requires more effort than you can or are willing to exert, you are setting yourself for certain failure. Choose a goal that is important and meaningful, otherwise you will struggle to find the motivation needed to progress towards its completion. If you have a difficult time coming up with a reasonable plan that will allow you to accomplish your goal, it may not be the right intention. The goal should be specific, realistic, and measurable.

Prioritize Your Resolutions

While many people fail to achieve their New Year’s resolutions because they choose unrealistic goals, others fail because they pick too many resolutions to manage. It is easier to accomplish goals if you concentrate on one goal at a time. When goal setting, think about what goal you have for yourself that means the most to you. It also helps to separate your larger, long-term goals into smaller goals. This can help ensure your plan doesn’t feel overwhelming.

Plan Ahead for Obstacles

Many people experience setbacks early on as they work towards their New Year’s resolutions, which cause them to become discouraged and give up. No matter who you are or what your goals are, you’re likely to encounter obstacles as you work to accomplish them. This is part of the process. Maintain a positive attitude when you experience setbacks and remind yourself that you can still achieve your goals in spite of hurdles. It also helps to predict what obstacles might occur so you can avoid them or have more time to prepare yourself to overcome them.

While New Year’s resolutions are notoriously hard to achieve, that doesn’t mean you can’t make the most of 2021 and accomplish your career goals for the year. As long as you choose goals that mean something to you, approach resolutions realistically, focus on one goal at a time, and plan ahead for setbacks, you can achieve your goals for the year.

 

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Being Your Own Worst Critic

By Career Guidance, Leadership

Most would say the cliché that they are their own worst critic but should consider putting a formal structure to this process. Individuals tend to fall into one of two categories. The first has an incessant looming cloud of pressure creeping in from all angles, resulting in a never-ending feeling of not living up to their potential. The other lives in naive bliss, refusing to make eye contact with the person they see staring back in the mirror. Regardless of which category describes you, the best leaders have a supreme level of self-awareness and emotional intelligence. Introspective reflection is essential for leaders. It gives the brain time to take a break from the noise, unravel cause and effect, and create meaning. This meaning creates a catalyst for actions rooted in purpose and significance.

The Questions

In experiential learning, enlightenment comes from taking the opportunity to think about what you experience, both personally and professionally.

  • What are the things I’m most passionate about?
  • What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?
  • What am I most grateful for?
  • What are the biggest things I’ve learned in life to date?
  • What are my goals in life? (health, career, family, financial, spiritual)
  • Who are the people in my life who have achieved similar goals? What can I learn from them?
  • Who are the five people I spend the most time with? Are they enabling or holding me back, or inspiring me to be a better person than I am today?
  • If I were to die tomorrow, what would be my biggest regret?
  • What limiting beliefs am I holding on to? Are they helping me achieve my goals, or holding me back?
  • What bad habits do I want to break? How?
  • What good habits do I want to cultivate? How?
  • Am I living my life to the fullest right now? If not, what would represent a fuller life for me?
  • Who do I want to be one year from today? What do I need to do to initiate that growth?
  • How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

Rationalizing Failure

Most people would agree that the things worth having and achieving in life do not come easily. When things get tough, we have a tendency to rationalize why we are not succeeding in our pursuits:

  •  “I don’t have enough time.”
  • “It just wasn’t in the cards.”
  • “I decided it wasn’t really what I wanted.”
  • “It is not the right time. I will pursue when I have more balance.”

Rationalization is the use of feeble but plausible arguments either to justify something that is difficult to accept or to make it seem ‘not so bad after all’. We do this because it’s hard to accept the reality that if you want to succeed in any endeavor worth pursing, you have to put in the time and often be comfortable with being uncomfortable. We all know that it is easier to blame external factors instead of blaming oneself, and this habit can be one of the toughest to break but is a true necessity for a high level of self-awareness.

The Problem

What holds us back from taking action on the change needed to improve ourselves? In other words, why do 98% of New Year’s Resolutions fail? It’s simple: the rewards of these changes are in the future when the discomfort and discipline are happening right now. When there’s an absence of a compelling reason or drive, you will be like a thermostat. You’ll work as hard as necessary to keep the temperature comfortable, and when it reaches that temperature, you’ll turn off until needed again. Discussing change and goals can be inspiring, energizing, and stimulating. Yet it can feel tough, awkward, annoying, frightening, and completely unpleasant to discuss the discipline needed to reach those goals. There is no shame in being average or competent if you are unwilling to pay the price of excellence. Simply ask yourself if you are willing to pay that price, and what the price looks like for you.

Allocating Attention

Most of us are used to focusing on externally oriented attention. It is simpler and more straightforward to focus on something outside of ourselves, such as work, television, a significant other, children, or almost anything that engages our senses. Our internal world is far more complicated, with a varied landscape of emotions, feelings, and perceptions. Yet it is often the internal world that determines whether we are having a good day or not, or whether we are happy or unhappy. That’s why we can feel angry despite beautiful surroundings or feel perfectly happy despite being stuck in traffic. Perhaps for that reason, this newly discovered pathway of attention may hold the key to greater well-being.

 

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Why Having a Mentor Is Important

By Executive Assistant, Hiring Strategies, Leadership

A mentor can be an invaluable source of knowledge and guidance, but finding the right mentor isn’t always easy, especially if your career is just starting out. Here are some of the top reasons having a good mentor is important, as well as some tips on how to find one.

Mentors Speed up the Learning Process

One of the biggest advantages of having a mentor is that it improves your ability to learn new skills and retain more knowledge. A good mentor will already have been in your position, so they are excellent source of knowledge. They may also have tips on how to learn necessary skills faster. A mentor can point out your blind spots and identify areas where you need to improve, which can also speed up the learning process.

Mentors Keep You More Engaged

A good mentor will be a source of support. Mentors can assist you in goal setting and provide you with the kind of encouragement you need to stay motivated. If you feel alone, you are more likely to give up or become disengaged. Mentors can keep you more focused and give you the inspiration and guidance you need to develop your skills and progress toward your career goals.

Identify Career Objectives

If you want to find the right mentor, first you have to understand what your long-term and short-term goals are. Once you know what you want your career to look like in the future, you can start to look for professionals who have experiences you can benefit from. The best goals are clear and specific. Set goals that are easily measurable and think about the goals you have for your mentorship. What knowledge do you seek to attain and what new skills do you wish to develop? These types of questions can allow you to effectively narrow down candidates for your mentor.

Look for Someone Who Thinks Differently Than You

The best mentors aren’t necessarily people who have similar personalities as you, or even do work that is similar to yours. In some cases, you might find a mentor who works in another department. Mentors who think differently than you can challenge you and help you expand your learning and communication styles. A mentor should push you outside of your comfort zone.

Finding the perfect mentor can fast-track your career in C-level support and allow you to grow professionally in ways you wouldn’t expect. They key is to understand what you want your mentor-mentee relationship to accomplish and connect with a mentor who will provide you with support and encouragement, while also challenging you.

 

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4 Tips to Beat the Procrastination Habit

By Executive Assistant, Hiring Strategies, Leadership

Procrastination is one of the worst habits you can have as an executive support professional, but it is also one of the most common. Though everyone does it to some degree, procrastination negatively affects focus, productivity, and performance. These four tips will help you overcome procrastination and become more efficient.

1. Understand Why You Procrastinate

If you want to beat your procrastination habit, first you have to understand why you tend to procrastinate in the first place. Start by thinking about what tasks you are most likely to avoid. Do you avoid tasks you find difficult or are you more likely to avoid tasks you find uninteresting? Do you avoid tasks when you’re feeling overwhelmed or anxious? Some people also procrastinate out of indecision. Once you understand why you procrastinate, you can start addressing the root of the problem.

2. Identify and Eliminate Distractions

Having a lot of distractions nearby can make procrastination much more tempting. What are your top distractions? Do you procrastinate by checking non-urgent emails? Do you play around on your phone or chat with colleagues? Once you identify major distractions, you can start to eliminate them. If you have trouble focusing when there are other people around you, for example, you can reduce the temptation to procrastinate by finding a quiet workspace away from others.

3. Be Realistic About Your Goals

One reason people procrastinate is because they feel overwhelmed by a task. This often occurs when a person has too much on their plate. Being realistic about goals and deadlines can make tasks more manageable and eliminate the feeling that you have to procrastinate to cope. You can make to-do lists and goals more attainable by prioritizing tasks by urgency and breaking large projects into smaller tasks.

4. Keep Yourself Accountable

To overcome procrastination, you also need to keep yourself accountable. One way to do this is to choose someone at work whom you trust to monitor your progress. Encourage your friends at work to call you out if they see you losing focus or putting off important tasks. Another way to keep yourself accountable to your goals related to procrastination is to give yourself rewards for accomplishing major tasks and projects on time.

Most people don’t procrastinate because they’re unorganized or lazy. Most procrastinators are hard workers who avoid tasks when they’re stressed or overwhelmed at work. Anyone can overcome this habit if they put their mind to it. The key is to figure out why you procrastinate in the first place, eliminate triggers, and reward better behavior.

 

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Later Will Be Now Before You Know It

By Career Guidance, Leadership

Knowing what you know now, having all of life’s experiences thus far behind you, what would you do differently?

The Present

Why is this important? Because if you are reading this, you have a gift sitting in front of you. Every single person reading this article has this gift in common.

The gift? Time.

Why is it that the question of “what would you do differently” is most commonly asked following a negative event? It could follow a missed opportunity to land a big client, a health scare, the sudden loss of a loved one. Why must it take being jarred out of the routine of life before reflection becomes a prioritization?

The weekend should not be a 48-hour countdown until Monday, and Friday should not feel like the victorious finish line of a marathon. What if instead of being vulnerable to the regrets of the future, we take a moment, take a breath, and decide what we want to do differently – starting today.

The Past

Fill in the blanks:

I wish I would have____________
I would have spent less time____________
I would have spent more time____________
I would have worked____________
I would have focused more on____________
I would have focused less on____________
I would have worried more about____________
I would have worried less about____________
I would have cherished____________

The intent behind this exercise is not to create a laundry list of missed opportunities. Holding on to regrets can be a form of self-sabotage. In fact, in many cases it is impossible to have made a better decision at the time. We were doing the best we could with what we had in the moment. But as life’s experiences evolve, so do we. Values change, financial circumstances change, confidence and maturity change. We are meant to grow and outgrow past versions of ourselves. But life moves quickly, and the routine of everyday norms can accidentally engage the autopilot setting of survival.

Fill in the blanks above for all aspects of a balanced life, including relationships, career, health and financial. Then take each of the “I would have” statements of the past and revise them to be your non-negotiables for the future.

The Focus: What Would You Do Differently?

It is not possible to manage time. It keeps marching forward regardless of what we do. However, our energy is one of the most valuable things we can control. What do you allow to take this most precious asset of yours? Who and what receives your focus and your attention? If you ever feel like your energy is depleted but are not sure where it went, you may need to focus on the proverbial “apps you have running in the background.” With so much high-tech in our daily lives it can leave little energy left for high-touch attention. Consider the following to give yourself more battery life:

  • Give yourself a full hour to start your day before allowing yourself to check email on phone/computer
  • Eat lunch anywhere besides staring at the phone/computer
  • Disable push notifications for social media, news, email, etc.
  • Leave devices in another room during meals and while sleeping
  • Delete certain apps entirely and relegate usage of those apps to a web browser only
  • Switch your phone display to grayscale, making the colorful icons less attention-grabbing

Recognize that there is something bigger at play here: there may be a deeply rooted connection as to why the phone ceased to be enjoyable, and instead something you are virtually compelled to use. Connect the feeling behind the activity:

  • Feeling lonely, so time to check social media plan something enjoyable with a friend/family
  • Need something positive to happen at work, so I’ll keep refreshing my email spend time making new possible opportunities happen at work
  • Nervous about all of the chaos going on in the world, so need to check the news again do something that makes life feel less chaotic today
  • Feeling bored, so need a distraction to work on being comfortable spending some time alone with your own thoughts

In a culture that is bombarded with information and stimuli, finding time void of noise can seem inconceivable. However, it is in that void that we are able to tap into the part of the brain that can process thoughts of deep significance. Give your mind the space to take all of the information it’s received and make use of it in important ways by doing things differently.

Instead of a fear of feeling bored, consider instead a failure to appreciate the repercussions of not being bored enough.

Later will be now before you know it. It’s time to value the gift of time.

 

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How to Foster a Growth Mindset for Professional Success

By Executive Assistant, Hiring Strategies, Leadership

Success in C-level support is often determined by mindset. Professionals who believe in their own potential are more likely to progress in their career than professionals who doubt themselves or believe they aren’t capable of becoming better. The following tips will help you foster a growth mindset.

Practice Self-Reflection

In order to develop a growth mindset, it’s important to know who you are. Begin to understand as much as you can about your skills, talents, and challenges. This will give you a clearer idea of what areas can be improved upon and what talents are being underutilized in your current job that can still be tapped later. Self-reflection helps you gain insight into who you are and what you can become.

Embrace Your Ability to Change

It is common for people to believe that things like intelligence and personality are set it stone. In reality, most aspects of who you are can change if you put your mind to it. If you think your intelligence and capability are static, your focus is on proving your worth instead of on personal growth. Most qualities that define you are really just a starting point. By pushing yourself outside your comfort zone, gaining new experiences, and expanding your knowledge, you can change many aspects of yourself, including your personality, aptitude, and skillset.

Challenge Yourself

One of the main reasons people fail to grow in their professional life is from not challenging themselves enough. When you do the same kind of tasks every day, you become comfortable with the status quo. However, when you embrace new challenges, you often discover new talents you didn’t know you had. By taking on tasks that are outside your comfort zone, you also put yourself in situations that provide opportunities to learn.

Choose Feedback over Praise

Many professionals seek out praise in their work. While praise isn’t inherently bad, it can be an obstacle to growth. When you seek out praise, the tendency is to take on responsibilities with which you know you can excel and lean heavily into the talents you already have. However, it’s unlikely you will get smarter and more skilled by playing it safe. To grow, it’s essential to perform tasks you know will require effort on your part or even tasks that can lead you to instances of failure. Be open-minded about failure and seek out feedback. This is the only way to learn new skills and expand your capabilities.

When you cultivate a growth mindset, you have the ability to continuously gain new talents, improve your intelligence, and become a more valuable employee. To shift toward a growth mindset, you have to learn about your strengths and weaknesses, come to terms with your potential, challenge yourself every chance you get and embrace failure.

 

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4 Skills That Will Make You the Leader Others Want to Follow

By Executive Assistant, Leadership, Training

There are a few traits all great leaders in the c-suite have in common, such as excellent communication skills and the ability to take charge. But not all great leaders inspire people to want to follow them. These four underrated skills will help you become the best leader you can be.

1. Nimbleness

The business world changes rapidly. For this reason, the most effective leaders know how to identify and make sense of complex and dynamic business environments. Great leaders are nimble; they have the ability to respond quickly to change. Essentially, the best leaders can sense opportunities when they present themselves and then take advantage of those opportunities by acting decisively.

2. Receptivity to Feedback

The best leaders continually work on improving themselves. They know there is always room for improvement, so they listen closely when people give them feedback and are not defensive in reaction. As a leader, when you listen to criticism and take it in stride, you also encourage your employees to embrace constructive feedback. Thus, receptivity not only helps you improve your leadership capabilities, it also helps to improve performance of your team members.

3. Diplomacy

Diplomacy is one of the most under appreciated leadership skills. Few things can impede the success of a team as much having a toxic work environment. While there will always be conflict in the workplace, leaders who are diplomatic know how to mitigate conflict without alienating employees. Diplomacy also help leaders get along with all of their team members, even if their personalities clash. Ultimately, great leaders need to be able to stay professional.

4. Accountability

Excellent leaders practice accountability. They follow through on their commitments, keep their promises, and take responsibility for their mistakes. One way to improve accountability is to plan for the unexpected. For example, it’s smart to assume tasks will take longer than you think in case you encounter any roadblocks. When you show accountability, people are more likely to see you as trustworthy and responsible. These are the kind of traits that make people want to follow you.

There are many different skills and characteristics that can make someone an effective leader, but not all great leaders are exceptional. Nimbleness, receptivity, diplomacy, and accountability are four skills can make you an exceptional leader who inspires your employees to be their best.

 

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Embodying Cultural Awareness at Work

By Executive Assistant, Leadership, Training

As the C-suite becomes more and more diverse, companies and their employees need to actively work on raising their cultural awareness. Truly embodying cultural awareness in the workplace means understanding differences in cultures and giving everyone an equal level of respect. It also involves eliminating unconscious biases and normalizing the idea that diversity makes an organization stronger.

Benefits of Cultural Awareness

When your company embodies cultural awareness, everyone benefits. Employees feel more comfortable in their work environment and are encouraged to learn from each other. Cultural awareness is also the first step in creating an inclusive work culture. When everyone on your team feels valued and respected, the team works better together, and employee engagement and productivity increase. Cultural awareness can also improve a company’s ability to solve problems because the team can approach problems from many different perspectives.

It Starts with Research

The first step is to recognize that everyone has preconceived notions about other cultures that may not be true. In developing cultural awareness, you have to set aside assumptions and research with an open mind. Part of this requires you to talk to people with diverse backgrounds and listen. As you work on advancing cultural awareness in the workplace, monitor your own behavior in interacting with people from other cultures. This is the easiest way to identify any unconscious biases you may have. Research cultural practices to better understand how to show respect to employees from different backgrounds than your own.

Learn How to Communicate Flexibly

Communication practices differ from one culture to the next. It’s important to take the time to learn about communication variations related to culture because it helps avoid misunderstandings and workplace conflict. For example, a word in one culture can be a compliment but, in another culture, it could be an insult. With this in mind, when a company embodies cultural awareness, overall communication improves over time. This, in turn, helps employees work harmoniously as a team, allowing for more cooperation.

The C-Suite is becoming more diverse, which means it is more important than ever that companies start thinking more about how they can improve cultural awareness in the workplace. Cultural awareness and inclusivity helps ensure all employees feel respected, improves communication, encourages teamwork, and more. The key is to promote self-reflection and interaction because it is the best way to learn about different cultures and eliminate unconscious biases.

 

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